What Do You Want Your Children to Remember About Christmas?

When your children are grown and have families of their own, what do you hope they will remember about Christmas? Will they remember the Barbie they couldn’t wait to open or the train set under the tree? I can still remember the Christmas my sister Mellissa and I got skis, and there is nothing wrong with those wonderful gifts and memories.

But I wonder if the things that stay with our children the longest are the things we did together—the cookies we baked and delivered to the fire station, the neighbor’s leaves we raked, or the person we quietly blessed who needed to know someone cared.

Will they remember that Christmas wasn’t just about what was waiting for them under the tree, but about looking beyond themselves and noticing someone else? And most importantly, when all the presents are long forgotten, will they remember why we celebrated in the first place—the birth of Jesus, the greatest gift ever given?

We only get so many Christmases with our children under our roof. What we choose to make important now may become what they make important in their own homes someday.

I have thought about this more as my own girls have grown up. When they were little, December was busy. There were presents to buy, cookies to bake, decorations to put up, places to go, and all the normal things that still had to get done. Like most moms, I wanted Christmas to be special for them. But now that my girls are adults, I realize that some of my favourite memories aren't the big things we planned. They are the little traditions we repeated year after year.

Our 24 Christmas Books

One tradition I especially loved started before December even began. I would gather 24 Christmas books and wrap every single one of them.

Each evening, one of the girls got to choose a book to unwrap. We would curl up together on the couch and read it before bed. Some of the books told the story of Jesus' birth, while others were simply fun Christmas stories that made us laugh.

The girls didn't need 24 new books every year. I could wrap books we already owned and bring out old favourites again. The fun was choosing the package, opening it, and discovering which story we would read that night.

I don't know whether Emma and Ellie could tell you the titles of all those books today. What I hope they remember is sitting together on the couch, choosing that night's book, and having something special to look forward to each evening during December.

The Traditions We Repeat Matter

You don't need an elaborate Christmas plan to create family traditions. In fact, many of the things children enjoy doing every year are very simple.

Bake the same cookies every December. Drive around one evening looking at Christmas lights. Turn on Christmas music while you decorate the tree. Light the Advent candles each Sunday. Make Christmas cards for grandparents. Play the same family game on Christmas Eve or let the children make decorations for the tree.

The important thing isn't trying to fit all of these into December. Pick the things your family enjoys and repeat them. That is how something as simple as reading a book on the couch can eventually become, “Remember how we always used to do that at Christmas?”

Make Serving Part of the Tradition Too

I also wanted our girls to understand that Christmas wasn't only about what they were going to receive. There are so many simple ways to include serving and giving in the Christmas season, and children are never too young to begin.

Take cookies to the fire station. Make a card for someone who lives alone. Thank the mail carrier. Help an elderly neighbour. Choose a gift for a child in need. Visit someone at a retirement home. None of these things needs to be complicated, but they give children an opportunity to think about someone besides themselves.

That is also a big part of why I wrote The Blessing Nisser. In the story, Rasmus and Ingrid leave Charlotte opportunities to serve the people around her. The book doesn't end with Charlotte's family, though. The 25 Acts of Kindness Cards included with the book give children opportunities to begin serving in their own homes and communities.

The story moves from Charlotte's family into your own

What Will Your Children Remember?

I hope my girls remember a few of the presents we gave them over the years. There were a few they were absolutely thrilled to find under the tree! But I also know presents are not the only things they remember.

I trust they remember the books on the couch, the Christmas music, the cookies, the traditions we brought from Denmark, the things we did for other people, and the time we spent together.

Most of all, I hope they remember why we celebrated Christmas in the first place. As a Christian family, Christmas has always been about the birth of Jesus. Teaching our children to serve others was part of teaching them about Him because Jesus came not to be served, but to serve.

So as you plan Christmas this year, perhaps there is a better question than, “What else do I need to do?”

Ask yourself: What do I want my children to remember?

Then choose a few traditions that help create those memories and give yourself permission not to do everything else.

God Jul and be a blessing!

Kirstie