Teaching Children to Serve Others: A Gift That Lasts a Lifetime

As parents and grandparents, we all hope our children grow into kind and compassionate adults. We want them to notice the child sitting alone, offer a helping hand without being asked, see when someone is hurting, and understand that sometimes the greatest joy comes when we stop thinking about ourselves and begin thinking about someone else.

But children don’t automatically know how to do that. Serving others is something we teach them, just like we teach them to read, ride a bike, tie their shoes, or say thank you. We teach it through our words, but perhaps even more importantly, we teach it through what they see us do.

Some of my favourite childhood memories come from growing up in Denmark, where Christmas was about so much more than the presents under the tree. It was a time to slow down, gather together, enjoy traditions that had been passed through generations, and remember what Christmas was really about. Those memories stayed with me when I had my own children, and years later they became part of the inspiration behind The Blessing Nisser.

Serving Doesn’t Have to Be Something Big

Sometimes we think serving needs to be a big project, volunteer all day, a donation, or something we have planned weeks in advance. But some of the best opportunities to teach our children to serve happen in the middle of ordinary life.

A young child can draw a picture for a grandparent or help pick up a sibling’s toys. An older child can bake cookies for a neighbour, carry groceries for someone who needs help, write a card to someone who is lonely, or visit a nursing home. A teenager can help a younger child, volunteer at church, encourage a friend who is struggling, or simply notice the person everyone else seems to overlook.

And at any age, our children can pray for someone who is hurting. These things may seem small to us, but they are teaching something much bigger. We are teaching our children to look beyond themselves. We are helping them develop eyes that notice other people and hearts that are willing to respond.

Let Them See You Serve

One of the best ways we can teach our children to serve is simply to let them see us doing it. Children are watching us far more closely than we sometimes realize. They notice when we take a meal to someone who is sick, check on an elderly neighbour, volunteer at church, encourage a friend, or stop what we are doing to help someone who needs us. They are learning what matters to us by watching how we spend our time and how we treat other people.

We can tell our children to be kind, generous and thoughtful, but when they see those things lived out in front of them, the lesson becomes real. Serving stops being something we occasionally do and begins to become part of who we are.

Christmas Gives Us a Beautiful Opportunity

Christmas is such a natural time to begin creating these habits because the entire season points us toward the greatest gift we have ever been given—Jesus.

It can also be a season when children are constantly being asked what they want.

What do you want for Christmas? What are you hoping Santa brings you?

There is nothing wrong with the excitement of Christmas morning, but in the middle of all that anticipation, we also have an opportunity to gently turn our children’s attention outward. Instead of always asking, “What do you want?”, what if we also began asking: “Who can we bless today?

I love that question because the answer doesn’t have to be complicated. Maybe we take cookies to a neighbour. Maybe we make a card for someone who lives alone. Maybe we let someone go ahead of us in line, help a sibling without being asked, give a genuine compliment, or pray for a friend who is having a difficult day. One small question can begin to change the way a child sees the people around them.

We Are Cultivating a Love of Serving

Serving also has a wonderful way of growing gratitude. When children begin looking for ways to help other people, their focus slowly shifts. Instead of always wondering, “What am I getting?”, they begin to ask, “What can I give?” That doesn’t happen overnight.

We are cultivating something in our children, and cultivating takes time. We plant seeds, give them opportunities, model what serving looks like, and then trust that those little lessons will continue to grow.

We don’t need to create perfect moments or plan elaborate acts of service. We simply need to create opportunities. A smile. A hug. A kind note. A helping hand. A prayer. Small things, perhaps, but small things done with love can have an enormous impact.

The Heart Behind The Blessing Nisser

That is really the heart behind The Blessing Nisser. As children follow Charlotte Olsen and her family through the story, Rasmus and Ingrid, the two little nisser, begin leaving Charlotte opportunities to serve. As Charlotte follows their challenges and serves the people around her, something begins to happen. Her kindness doesn’t only affect her—it begins to affect the people she serves.

That was always important to me when I wrote the story. I didn’t want children simply to finish a Christmas book and put it back on the shelf. I wanted the story to move from Charlotte’s family into their own family. That is why The Blessing Nisser includes 25 Acts of Kindness Cards. The story may begin with Charlotte, Rasmus and Ingrid, but the serving continues with your children. They get to discover for themselves that they are never too young to make a difference in someone else’s life.

And eventually, children discover the reason Charlotte is able to love and serve the way she does. She loves Jesus, and Jesus showed us what it means to serve.

In Mark 10:45, Jesus tells us that He came “not to be served, but to serve.” That is the heart I hope children begin to understand—not simply that serving is a nice thing to do, but that when we love Jesus, we can share His love with the people around us.

This Christmas, we may not remember every present that was underneath the tree. Our children probably won’t either. But they may remember the neighbour whose face lit up when they delivered cookies, the person who needed a hug, the family they prayed for, or the feeling they had when they realized that something they did made another person’s day a little brighter. Those are gifts that can last far beyond Christmas. So perhaps tomorrow morning, ask your children one simple question:

“Who can we bless today?” Then see where it leads.

God Jul and be a blessing.

Kirstie